Do you know what type of Parent you are? (Hint: One is the best)

Let me tell you something most of you might already know but that I am just now finding out: reasoning with a toddler can be a testing and trying experience.

Reasoning with a toddler can be a testing and trying experience

My daughter, who is two and a half, has gotten to the point where she can climb into our SUV to get into her car seat. It was cute for about two weeks… but it now takes 10 to 15 minutes to “reason” with her or convince her that she should get into her seat because we were supposed to be somewhere 5 minutes ago.

Now on to your regular programming…

There are as many parenting styles as there are parents, but when you break it down, there are only three basic types of parenting (& a bonus 4th one at the bottom)

· Permissive parents are generally caring and loving but are also very lax regarding discipline.

· Authoritarian parents tend to be very strict and expect their children to obey without question.

· Authoritative parents are a nice balance between the two extremes. They set limits and expectations for their children but are open to negotiation and discussion.

Below is a more in-depth look at these styles

Permissive

Permissive parents are generally very loving, responsive, and accepting. They are typically very involved in their children’s lives and try to be friends with them. They often give in to their children’s demands and do not enforce rules or guidelines. This parenting style can be beneficial in that it can help children feel loved and secure. However, it can also be detrimental because children may not learn to control themselves or follow the rules.

Permissive parenting is characterized by low structure, expectations, and discipline demands. Permissive parents are generally hovering (helicopters) and responsive to their child’s needs and emotional states, but they tend to be less demanding and have fewer rules and expectations. This can sometimes lead to less independent and capable children and worldlier parents who are more indulgent.

Authoritarian

Authoritarian parenting is a parenting style characterized by high expectations and little warmth. This parenting style is often described as strictly enforcing rules and not allowing children much input or control over their own lives. Authoritarian parents are often seen as being unresponsive to their children’s emotional needs and may resort to physical discipline to enforce their rules.

Although authoritative parenting has been linked to some positive outcomes, such as obedient and well-behaved children, it has also been associated with some adverse effects, such as low self-esteem and anxiety.

Many authoritarian parents expect their kids to follow a specific path & schooling in life with little deviation. Authoritarian parenting can harm children if it is rigorous and does not allow flexibility. If you are an overbearing parent, it is essential to try to be consistent in your parenting and to avoid being overly punitive. Putting too many rules or restrictions can lead to rebellious kids or even major regrets as they become adults.

Authoritative

Authoritative parenting is characterized by high expectations and a great deal of communication. This parenting style has produced the best outcomes in children regarding their academic achievement, mental health, and overall well-being.

You can do a few key things to be an authoritative parent:

· First, it is essential that you nurture a warm and supportive relationship with your child. This will help them feel comfortable coming to you with any problems or concerns.

· Secondly, you must set clear rules and expectations for your child’s behavior. It is crucial that your child knows what is expected of them and that they are held accountable for their actions.

· Lastly, being responsive to your child’s needs would be best. This means being open to communication and adjusting your expectations when necessary.

We know this style is best for our kids, but it can be tough not to sway too far into the other two. Having some accountability, either through your spouse or significant other, a support group of other parents, or even your kids acting as a check and balance system, can help ensure you succeed with authoritative parenting because we know parenting is hard. And for people who aren’t parents, it is tough to grasp how consuming it can be.

So, which parenting style is best?

Most experts consider the authoritative style the best of both sides. However, each merit can be debated. Each type has its strengths and weaknesses, and what works for one family might not work for another.

By the time our kids are in grade school, most will have a more strict & regimented schedule than many prisoners. Make sure, whichever style you are or choose to be, that you ensure your children have enough freedom to be a kid and be curious.

Ensure your children have enough freedom to be a kid and be curious.

However, that's not all. There is a hidden 4th one gaining steam that no one wants to talk about, but we need to acknowledge it in this day and age.

First, the excellent news…If you are reading this, chances are you are not the 4th one since you probably care or want to care about your kids.

Uninvolved parenting is the 4th type that has exploded in the last 20 years.

Uninvolved parenting is the 4th type that has exploded in the last 20 years. This type of parent would rather give their kid an iPad and watch their own football game separately or binge-watch some shows on Netflix instead of spending quality time with them.

Back in the day, this used to be the wealthy parents sending their kids off to boarding school, but in today’s environment, this looks like a parent who gets a bunch of tech and apps on the iPhone so those devices can parent and babysit. The uninvolved parent might also struggle to find the magic in the piece of new artwork that their child so proudly brings home from school or the excitement surrounding making it to the state playoffs.

If you find yourself in this category, a wake-up call (maybe reading this) will help to jolt you out of this style because no parent wants to raise a kid based on apathy.

Don’t be the 4th one. You have a responsibility not to be this style of parenting.

This post is brought to you by 1-Decision.com.

We are helping parents automate everyday decisions in their life so they can be more involved in the things that matter (like the tiny humans you call your kids)

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